Written To Pastor Deborah Who Was Known At This Time As Pastor Jan
Written By A Spiritually Born Again Multi-Generational Satanist Who Was Still Unable To Get Completely Free Of This Life
February 2001
I’ve Allowed You In My Head
Gave You My Everything, My Love, My Honor, My Respect
Went Through The Deepest Darkness
Been Behind The Scenes,
While You Went Public
Looked Into The Eyes Of The Storm
And Still The Fires Of Hell Continue To Burn Inside Of Me
When I Look In Your Eyes, I See The Ultimate Void
So Much Time Wasted On Things That Don’t Really Matter Now
Nothing Is The Same, Nothing Can Ever Be
I Wish This Madness Would Go Away
When I Close My Eyes, I Still See It There
It Doesn’t Go Away
People Dressed In All Black
The Smell Of Sulfur And Burning Flesh
Young Kids Screaming
Because Their Bodies Don’t Go That Way
See how You Had To Manipulate Just To Get Your Way
Nothing Common Suits You
You Are Always So Alone
Even In A Crowd Of Thousands
You Are Always Alone
Black Mass Time Again
We Watched Those Bare Bodies Rock & Twist
See The Demons Swell Up Inside Of You
Throw Yourself Into The Flames
My Son Is Gone
And It Will Never Be The Same
You Gave Yourself To The Ultimate Evil
Sold Your Soul To The Devil Himself
All Your Rituals & Sacrifices Wasted
As You Look At Yourself And See Nothing Left
The Scars & Shame Don’t Go Away
The Void Inside Cannot Be Filled
God Is Dead
And Hope Doesn’t Exist
No Reason To Live
This Does Not Make Any Sense
I Am Trying To Push You Out
Before This Thing Sucks You In
Do Not Let It Get You
You Will Become Just Like One Of Them
This Battlefield In My Head
There Is A War Between My Eyes
I Look Over My Past
See All Those Tears I Made You Cry
I Am So Sorry For Bringing You Into This Hell
I Wanted To Be The Perfect Child
So Pardon Me While I Burst Into Flames
Pardon Me, Pardon Me
I’ll Never Be The Same
Good-Bye My Love
Good-Bye